The final depressing straw.

The horror of the bed crater has finally broken me, while walking home from work I went in to a local chemist and jumped on to the stores digital scales, for the princely sum of 50p I now know that I am 5 ft 4.2 inches tall, and weigh a frankly depressing and somewhat scary 11st 10lb which gives me a BMI (although I tend to deride it as a measurement of a persons size) of 28.

According to said print out my ideal weight range is 7st 10lb - 10st 6lb. At 9st in the past I looked gaunt and ill, so my aim for the time being get down to the top of the ideal range 10st 6lb in the next 6 months.

To this end I have registered a profile on myfitnesspal - a diet and weigh loss website which also syncs with an android phone app. I have used it in the past but sporadically and before the advent of smart phones, so getting back in to the habit of keeping track of my food, drink and exersize shouldn't take too long. Wish me luck, this will be the first time in my life that I have embarked on a 'diet' of any real kind, so am somewhat apprehensive about how well I'll get on with it.

How to fill time for the rest of the year.

1. 1. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
2. 2. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
3. 3. His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman
4. 6. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
5. 10. Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë
6. 11. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
7. 12. Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë
8. 13. Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
9. 15. The Catcher in the Rye, JD Salinger
10. 17. Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
11. 20. War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy
12. 21. Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell
13. 25. The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
14. 27. Middlemarch, George Eliot
15. 28. A Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving
16. 29. The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck
17. 31. The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
18. 32. One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel Garc!a M!rquez
19. 33. The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett
20. 34. David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
21. 37. A Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
22. 38. Persuasion, Jane Austen
23. 39. Dune, Frank Herbert
24. 40. Emma, Jane Austen
25. 43. The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald
26. 44. The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
27. 45. Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh
28. 48. Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy
29. 50. The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher
30. 53. The Stand, Stephen King
31. 54. Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
32. 55. A Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth
33. 59. Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
34. 60. Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
35. 64. The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough
36. 67. The Magus, John Fowles
37. 71. Perfume, Patrick Süskind
38. 72. The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, Robert Tressell
39. 76. The Secret History, Donna Tartt
40. 77. The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
41. 78. Ulysses, James Joyce
42. 79. Bleak House, Charles Dickens
43. 80. Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
44. 83. Holes, Louis Sachar
45. 84. Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
46. 85. The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy
47. 86. Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
48. 87. Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
49. 88. Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
50. 89. Magician, Raymond E Feist
51. 90. On The Road, Jack Kerouac
52. 91. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
53. 92. The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
54. 94. The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho
55. 95. Katherine, Anya Seton
56. 96. Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer
57. 97. Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel Garc!a M!rquez
58. 98. Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
59. 101. Three Men In A Boat, Jerome K. Jerome
60. 104. Dracula, Bram Stoker
61. 105. Point Blanc, Anthony Horowitz
62. 106. The Pickwick Papers, Charles Dickens
63. 107. Stormbreaker, Anthony Horowitz
64. 108. The Wasp Factory, Iain Banks
65. 109. The Day Of The Jackal, Frederick Forsyth
66. 110. The Illustrated Mum, Jacqueline Wilson
67. 111. Jude The Obscure, Thomas Hardy
68. 113. The Cruel Sea, Nicholas Monsarrat
69. 114. Les Mis!rables, Victor Hugo
70. 115. The Mayor Of Casterbridge, Thomas Hardy
71. 116. The Dare Game, Jacqueline Wilson
72. 117. Bad Girls, Jacqueline Wilson
73. 118. The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde
74. 119. Shogun, James Clavell
75. 120. The Day Of The Triffids, John Wyndham
76. 121. Lola Rose, Jacqueline Wilson
77. 122. Vanity Fair, William Makepeace Thackeray
78. 123. The Forsyte Saga, John Galsworthy
79. 124. House Of Leaves, Mark Z. Danielewski
80. 125. The Poisonwood Bible, Barbara Kingsolver
81. 129. Possession, A. S. Byatt
82. 130. The Master And Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov
83. 133. East Of Eden, John Steinbeck
84. 136. The Color Purple, Alice Walker
85. 138. The Thirty-Nine Steps, John Buchan
86. 139. Girls In Tears, Jacqueline Wilson
87. 140. Sleepovers, Jacqueline Wilson
88. 141. All Quiet On The Western Front, Erich Maria Remarque
89. 142. Behind The Scenes At The Museum, Kate Atkinson
90. 143. High Fidelity, Nick Hornby
91. 144. It, Stephen King
92. 147. Papillon, Henri Charriere
93. 150. Skeleton Key, Anthony Horowitz
94. 155. Secrets, Jacqueline Wilson
95. 156. The Silver Sword, Ian Serraillier
96. 157. One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Ken Kesey
97. 158. Heart Of Darkness, Joseph Conrad
98. 159. Kim, Rudyard Kipling
99. 160. Cross Stitch, Diana Gabaldon
100. 163. Sunset Song, Lewis Grassic Gibbon
101. 164. The Shipping News, Annie Proulx
102. 165. The World According To Garp, John Irving
103. 166. Lorna Doone, R. D. Blackmore
104. 167. Girls Out Late, Jacqueline Wilson
105. 168. The Far Pavilions, M. M. Kaye
106. 172. They Used To Play On Grass, Terry Venables and Gordon Williams
107. 173. The Old Man And The Sea, Ernest Hemingway
108. 174. The Name Of The Rose, Umberto Eco
109. 176. Dustbin Baby, Jacqueline Wilson
110. 178. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
111. 179. Jonathan Livingstone Seagull, Richard Bach
112. 181. The Suitcase Kid, Jacqueline Wilson
113. 183. The Power Of One, Bryce Courtenay
114. 184. Silas Marner, George Eliot
115. 185. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis
116. 186. The Diary Of A Nobody, George and Weedon Grossmith
117. 187. Trainspotting, Irvine Welsh
118. 190. Sons And Lovers, D. H. Lawrence
119. 191. The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera
120. 194. The War Of The Worlds, H. G. Wells
121. 195. The Horse Whisperer, Nicholas Evans
122. 196. A Fine Balance, Rohinton Mistry
123. 198. The Once And Future King, T. H. White
124. 200. Flowers In The Attic, Virginia Andrews

At the moment I think this is my to read list all 124 books of it. My plan of attack is to check my Kindle purchases for any ebooks I have waiting to be read, then hit the local library for the rest - at a quick glance I have maybe 10 ebooks, leaving visits to the library for the remaining 114 or so. Childrens books I cannot book out as an adult library member so chances are I'll be the strange adult sat reading in the corner of the kids section.

Top 200 books

Among my friends I'm known as something of a book worm, I'm the girl they turn to when they want to borrow a book to go on holiday or just for something new to read, but I have never actually sat down and read according to a list. So when one of the girlies suggested I take a look at the BBC top 200 books list I was intrigued as to how many of them I've managed. The list is below - I'm off to work out how many I've managed how about you? 

1. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
2. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
3. His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman
4. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
5. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
6. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
7. Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne
8. Nineteen Eighty-Four, George Orwell
9. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, CS Lewis
10. Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë
11. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
12. Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë
13. Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
14. Rebecca, Daphne du Maurier
15. The Catcher in the Rye, JD Salinger
16. The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame
17. Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
18. Little Women, Louisa May Alcott
19. Captain Corelli's Mandolin, Louis de Bernieres
20. War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy
21. Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell
22. Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone, JK Rowling
23. Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling
24. Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling
25. The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
26. Tess Of The D'Urbervilles, Thomas Hardy
27. Middlemarch, George Eliot
28. A Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving
29. The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck
30. Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll
31. The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
32. One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel Garc!a M!rquez
33. The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett
34. David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
35. Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl
36. Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson
37. A Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
38. Persuasion, Jane Austen
39. Dune, Frank Herbert
40. Emma, Jane Austen
41. Anne Of Green Gables, LM Montgomery
42. Watership Down, Richard Adams
43. The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald
44. The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
45. Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh
46. Animal Farm, George Orwell
47. A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens
48. Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy
49. Goodnight Mister Tom, Michelle Magorian
50. The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher
51. The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett
52. Of Mice And Men, John Steinbeck
53. The Stand, Stephen King
54. Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
55. A Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth
56. The BFG, Roald Dahl
57. Swallows And Amazons, Arthur Ransome
58. Black Beauty, Anna Sewell
59. Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
60. Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
61. Noughts And Crosses, Malorie Blackman
62. Memoirs Of A Geisha, Arthur Golden
63. A Tale Of Two Cities, Charles Dickens
64. The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough
65. Mort, Terry Pratchett
66. The Magic Faraway Tree, Enid Blyton
67. The Magus, John Fowles
68. Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
69. Guards! Guards!, Terry Pratchett
70. Lord Of The Flies, William Golding
71. Perfume, Patrick Süskind
72. The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, Robert Tressell
73. Night Watch, Terry Pratchett
74. Matilda, Roald Dahl
75. Bridget Jones's Diary, Helen Fielding
76. The Secret History, Donna Tartt
77. The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
78. Ulysses, James Joyce
79. Bleak House, Charles Dickens
80. Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
81. The Twits, Roald Dahl
82. I Capture The Castle, Dodie Smith
83. Holes, Louis Sachar
84. Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
85. The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy
86. Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
87. Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
88. Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
89. Magician, Raymond E Feist
90. On The Road, Jack Kerouac
91. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
92. The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
93. The Colour Of Magic, Terry Pratchett
94. The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho
95. Katherine, Anya Seton
96. Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer
97. Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel Garc!a M!rquez
98. Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
99. The Princess Diaries, Meg Cabot
100. Midnight's Children, Salman Rushdie
101. Three Men In A Boat, Jerome K. Jerome
102. Small Gods, Terry Pratchett
103. The Beach, Alex Garland
104. Dracula, Bram Stoker
105. Point Blanc, Anthony Horowitz
106. The Pickwick Papers, Charles Dickens
107. Stormbreaker, Anthony Horowitz
108. The Wasp Factory, Iain Banks
109. The Day Of The Jackal, Frederick Forsyth
110. The Illustrated Mum, Jacqueline Wilson
111. Jude The Obscure, Thomas Hardy
112. The Secret Diary Of Adrian Mole Aged 13¾, Sue Townsend
113. The Cruel Sea, Nicholas Monsarrat
114. Les Mis!rables, Victor Hugo
115. The Mayor Of Casterbridge, Thomas Hardy
116. The Dare Game, Jacqueline Wilson
117. Bad Girls, Jacqueline Wilson
118. The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde
119. Shogun, James Clavell
120. The Day Of The Triffids, John Wyndham
121. Lola Rose, Jacqueline Wilson
122. Vanity Fair, William Makepeace Thackeray
123. The Forsyte Saga, John Galsworthy
124. House Of Leaves, Mark Z. Danielewski
125. The Poisonwood Bible, Barbara Kingsolver
126. Reaper Man, Terry Pratchett
127. Angus, Thongs And Full-Frontal Snogging, Louise Rennison
128. The Hound Of The Baskervilles, Arthur Conan Doyle
129. Possession, A. S. Byatt
130. The Master And Margarita, Mikhail Bulgakov
131. The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood
132. Danny The Champion Of The World, Roald Dahl
133. East Of Eden, John Steinbeck
134. George's Marvellous Medicine, Roald Dahl
135. Wyrd Sisters, Terry Pratchett
136. The Color Purple, Alice Walker
137. Hogfather, Terry Pratchett
138. The Thirty-Nine Steps, John Buchan
139. Girls In Tears, Jacqueline Wilson
140. Sleepovers, Jacqueline Wilson
141. All Quiet On The Western Front, Erich Maria Remarque
142. Behind The Scenes At The Museum, Kate Atkinson
143. High Fidelity, Nick Hornby
144. It, Stephen King
145. James And The Giant Peach, Roald Dahl
146. The Green Mile, Stephen King
147. Papillon, Henri Charriere
148. Men At Arms, Terry Pratchett
149. Master And Commander, Patrick O'Brian
150. Skeleton Key, Anthony Horowitz
151. Soul Music, Terry Pratchett
152. Thief Of Time, Terry Pratchett
153. The Fifth Elephant, Terry Pratchett
154. Atonement, Ian McEwan
155. Secrets, Jacqueline Wilson
156. The Silver Sword, Ian Serraillier
157. One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, Ken Kesey
158. Heart Of Darkness, Joseph Conrad
159. Kim, Rudyard Kipling
160. Cross Stitch, Diana Gabaldon
161. Moby Dick, Herman Melville
162. River God, Wilbur Smith
163. Sunset Song, Lewis Grassic Gibbon
164. The Shipping News, Annie Proulx
165. The World According To Garp, John Irving
166. Lorna Doone, R. D. Blackmore
167. Girls Out Late, Jacqueline Wilson
168. The Far Pavilions, M. M. Kaye
169. The Witches, Roald Dahl
170. Charlotte's Web, E. B. White
171. Frankenstein, Mary Shelley
172. They Used To Play On Grass, Terry Venables and Gordon Williams
173. The Old Man And The Sea, Ernest Hemingway
174. The Name Of The Rose, Umberto Eco
175. Sophie's World, Jostein Gaarder
176. Dustbin Baby, Jacqueline Wilson
177. Fantastic Mr Fox, Roald Dahl
178. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
179. Jonathan Livingstone Seagull, Richard Bach
180. The Little Prince, Antoine De Saint-Exupery
181. The Suitcase Kid, Jacqueline Wilson
182. Oliver Twist, Charles Dickens
183. The Power Of One, Bryce Courtenay
184. Silas Marner, George Eliot
185. American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis
186. The Diary Of A Nobody, George and Weedon Grossmith
187. Trainspotting, Irvine Welsh
188. Goosebumps, R. L. Stine
189. Heidi, Johanna Spyri
190. Sons And Lovers, D. H. Lawrence
191. The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera
192. Man And Boy, Tony Parsons
193. The Truth, Terry Pratchett
194. The War Of The Worlds, H. G. Wells
195. The Horse Whisperer, Nicholas Evans
196. A Fine Balance, Rohinton Mistry
197. Witches Abroad, Terry Pratchett
198. The Once And Future King, T. H. White
199. The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Eric Carle
200. Flowers In The Attic, Virginia Andrews

Boogienight

Once again I found myself clambering in to a bed warmed by mrhalf while slightly under the influence of our old friends Lady Vodka and Princess Vino. Once again I awoke feeling like a dead person might when they wake up and wonder if it's hell or purgatory they have won access to, and once again I feel the need to bless the simple amazing fact that mr half is sooo damn relaxed about my staying out in a nightclub with two of those creatures he generally refers to as the 'fat slags from the pads' (despite both being slimmer than me). I have no doubt that I'll go playing out with them again but I am under no illusions about them becoming my bestest friends, but it was lovely to spend time with someone who isn't male, Nepalese, or at work with me before returning to the place we call home at some godawful hour of the morning (just before the first train - the level crossing was winking at me through the spare room window while I attempted to remove my dancing shoes).


There are times he is infuriating, irritating, and a down right pain in the arse but the one thing I know I never need worry about is his thinking he needs to worry about what I get up to without him.

Course that leads in my less than hangover free state to wondering if it's because I'm such an ugly fat hound that he thinks noone else would look at me (btw the arse crater in the memory foam is not perceptibly reducing as yet) but then again quite frankly I don't much care because the daft sod has no escape until at the very least January next year when the lease runs out on our home.

And its time for me to take my sore feet and aching legs back to work, where I can caffeinate my hangover until my head is ready to explode.